Making Time For Christmas: Just Do It

I am launching a writing career. I have decided, at the craziest time of my life, with a five year old and an infant, to start my own business. “People who own their own businesses are married to their businesses.” My husband has said this to me a million times. We have discussed many ideas for businesses. And we have ultimately turned them all away because of that exact knowledge. I just never thought of writing as running my own business. I am here to tell you: it is the same damn thing. Often, that means putting other parts of life on hold. Fortunately, kids will not be put on hold. And because I also aim (AIM) to be a full time involved mom, with the Christmas season upon us, I am stopping, putting other priorities on hold, and making time for Christmas.

December

The month of December has only gotten more packed full of all of the experiences I want my kids to have for the Christmas season – cookies, 25 books of Christmas, lights, decorations, getting a tree, ice skating in San Francisco, plays, ballets, you name it. We have a lot on our plate.

At the same time, I want all of these experiences to be joyful, not stressful. So I have to plan them out, measure our time well, and spread things out throughout the month in ways that make sense for us.

Train of Lights

The first thing we did for the Christmas season this year was take a ride on the Niles Canyon Train of Lights just north of Fremont, California. The tickets sell out quickly, so I organized this event with our friends and got my butt online first thing to buy 19 (19!) tickets back in September when they went on sale.

We gathered together at the hopping Bronco Billy’s Pizzeria in Niles Canyon and then headed out to the train. The kids had a blast, enjoying hot chocolate, visiting like long lost friends, and hanging out of the side of the outside car to watch the lights on the outside of the cars as the train curved along its roundtrip path from Sunol to Niles and back. 

Matilda was quite a fan until it got to be past her bedtime. Then she started to lose her shit, and I had to show her every single light bulb I could find. She hung in like a champ.

The Tree!

The weekend after Thanksgiving is just too hectic for me to rush out to get a tree. So we went the following Sunday, the first weekend of December. We go as a family; Celaya runs around the lot screaming and hugging trees, and we measure each tree and kick its tires, as if we are making a huge investment in a lifelong companion.

For the last three years we have gone to a lot in Castro Valley run by the Boy Scouts of America. I had a horrible experience with an overpriced for profit lot a while back, and since then have decided to only support a good cause each year. The Boy Scouts have been great to us. The boys run out, eager to help us pick a tree, describing the differences among the types.

One of the boys will then saw the tree down and install a stand with a water bowl. Then they gather a small group and strap it to our car for us. You can’t beat that.

Matilda was totally uninterested in the entire process, and simply wanted to know when lunch was going to be happening, thank you very much.

There are always a ton of shenanigans as we struggle to unstrap the tree and get it from the car to the fifth floor of our building, up a tiny elevator. One year my brother, big show off, picked up the tree and ran full out with it over his shoulder. This year, the tree is a bit bigger, so the men had to practice teamwork.

 

Our big beautiful tree is up in our living room, desperate to be decorated. We will have to make that work piece by piece throughout the week, as time allows. Hey, we got the freaking tree.

Coming Up

Next weekend we’ve got zoo lights at the Oakland Zoo, after that we’ve got a play to go to in SF, followed by outdoors ice skating at the Embarcadero. A few days after Christmas, Celaya and I will go for the very first time to see the SF Ballet perform the Nutcracker. We will get all gussied up, have a fancy dinner in the city, and take our seats in the front row of the balcony at the War Memorial Opera House. Girls’ Night.

In the meantime, we will be baking cookies, finding time to go see Christmas Tree lane in Alameda, head over to the SF Zoo for their Winter Wonderland lights show and playground, opening up one wrapped book a day, and having a white elephant book exchange party with friends. And so much more.

It’s a Wonderful Life

My life is full. My husband is wondering if he still has a wife. Sometimes my baby has to pull on my pant leg to get my attention. And yes, of course, I often feel guilty. Will my kids forgive me for my absent mindedness right now while forging ahead with a writing career? Will my husband continue to be as patient as he has been for ignoring him while the kids are awake to take time for them, and while they’re asleep to take time to write?

I Hope So

Here’s what I know. The writing bug hit me, and it hit me hard. I think this happened right now for a reason, and I know that heeding this call makes me, in the end, a better mother and a better wife because I am doing something I love.

However, I will not forget that my children and my husband are major priorities in my life and that time waits for no woman. I will not be the woman who looks back on her life and says, longingly, sadly, “I wish I had made more time for my family.”

What I will do is use my guilt as gentle reminders to slow down, put off other things, let essays and contracts wait so I can snuggle, I can sit and read, I can kiss goodnight and sing five hundred bedtime songs. And I will let Christmas be a big reminder that life is about experiences, memories we make together, and the time and love we give to each other.

So I will be making time for Christmas. How? I will just do it. Because that will mean, for me, that I am making time for my kids, for my husband, for my friends, for my extended family. Because if I can’t organize, prioritize, and make that time, then the writing doesn’t matter anyway.