Freedom
Easily the thing that the human spirit strives most for is freedom. Especially in America, this is a thing both tangible and intangible that we discuss every single day. We punish trespassers by taking away freedom. We punish our children by restricting their freedom.
But we don’t seem to be giving freedom away anymore. We don’t seem to be discussing how crucial it is to real development. We don’t seem to be allowing our children freedom. We don’t seem to be allowing ourselves freedom.
Kids need freedom not only to explore their own interests, wander through wide open fields, and dream impossible dreams. They also need freedom to figure out who they are, to get in touch with their innermost thoughts and desires, and to practice over and over again what it means to be true to themselves.
Lost
My students are all lost, as so many of us are who have come through years of being told what to do, when to do it, how to do it.
And why do we do it?
Success.
“I only want what’s best for you.” We say to each other and to our children.
But the reality is that only we can know what’s best for us. And only our children can know what is best for them.
As a society, we have come to simply accept things as they are. The education system is abysmal, and we all know it, but we continue to send our children into it. The industrial workforce is an awful unhappy place, but we continue to populate it. Relationships are failing at increasing rates, but we continue to enter into them with the same expectations, and we continue to move through them with the same old, broken tools.
And missing in all of this is freedom.
Found
It is high time to rediscover our better selves. It is time to venture out into nature, spend the night in the woods, laugh out loud with friends in a quiet room, and show our children how much fun life is supposed to be.
It is high time we took off our armor, opened up our hearts, loved with big, full, bursting hopes, opened our arms, and trust-fell backward into the glittering oblivion of the future.
Because it is up to us to show our children how to create a new future.
It is up to us to allow them the freedom to color outside the lines, to find the magic in life, and to focus on only that, only the magic.
As they find that magic their senses will sharpen, their breaths will quicken, and their feet will take flight.
And they will create the better world we all want so badly.
Where Do We Start?
“How am I supposed to do all that Shanna? I have to live in the real world. I have to make money, pay bills, and take action now.”
Look, I’m not advocating quitting your job or yanking your kids out of school.
I get it. We’re all busy. I’m on my ninth day working with high school students in finals right now. And then I get home at 10:30 and write for clients. I wake up at 5:30 and post to my Facebook group, get some meditation in, and drink a buttload of coffee.
I get it.
But here’s the thing: it starts with one small step.
And here’s the greatest thing about that small step: our kids will show us the way.
Next time you take your kid to the park, take your shoes off and walk in the grass barefoot. Reconnect with nature. Encourage your kids take their shoes off. They’ll think you’re the greatest thing since fidget spinners.
Next time you’re worried about something, anything, ask yourself if there is anything you can do about it right now in this second. If the answer is no, then you have to let it go.
How?
Think about something else, something that makes you happy.
Next time you catch your kid in a silly moment, join her. Expand the moment, turn it into a tickle fest.
Next time you catch yourself saying no to something you actually want to do, say yes.
Next time you catch yourself holding yourself back, let yourself go.
It really is that simple.
Be like the kids.
And if you don’t have kids, find some. Go grab your niece and nephew for the day. Visit with your grandkids. Hell, read children’s literature.
Reconnect with the child inside you and don’t let her go.
You don’t have to quit your job; it can get so much better if you can see through the eyes of a lighthearted child.
Dishes can be fun, vacuuming can be fun, laundry can be fun, bills can be fun, if you can see through the eyes of a lighthearted child.
Change the World: Remember Your Why
Why do you want freedom? What will it feel like? Why do you work? Why do you love who you love? Why do you do anything you do?
If you can get to the heart of your why, you can have fun so much more often.
Vacuuming is fun for me because I love a clean floor. So I turn on music, throw my baby on my hip, and dance with my six year old in the living room, chasing kid toes with the suction hose as I clean the couch.
Writing is fun for me because I get to help people, whether it is my own readers or my clients.
Sleeping is fun for me because I love to feel rested, so I don’t usually pull those all nighters I’m pulling now.
Running and yoga are fun for me because I want a strong, healthy body and mind.
Connect to your why and shift your perspective, and you’ll find yourself feeling like a kid again.
Once you get there, you’ll find yourself opening up to allowing more freedom and joy for the children in your life.
And once you do that, big magic happens. Children grow into their wings and their mysticism, and they being to paint with colors we’ve never seen, stretching canvas in directions we’ve never been, flying higher than we’ve ever dreamed.
That’s how we change the world.
Beautifully written, and so very true! I feel exactly the same way looking at how stressed out my middle schooler is! I actually made the decision to try homeschooling for a year, and give my two kids a break! I want them to learn, but also to have fun, and enjoy their precious childhood! Great post! It actually made me feel good about my decision! 🙂
oh yay! I’m so happy! I love hearing that so very very much.
This is so awesome! I love your approach!
thanks!
Great post! Thank you for sharing your insight!
thanks!
Very insightful post, I really appreciated your thoughts on remembering your ‘why’. And, your kids are precious…love the photos!
oh thank you thank you thank you so much!
Great advice! I teach, and I see so many students who struggle when they don’t have explicit instructions. They want to be told how to do everything. They need freedom and room to be creative!
yes! This is exactly what I see!
I don’t like vaccum the house, lol, but I have too, listening to music while doing some stuff around the house actually make things done faster, I don’t know why, but it’s work!
haha it is indeed work!
Summer can be a super fun time. Kids definitely need time to run and play and we need to keep our sanity
haha right?! And I live in California so it’s pretty much always summer here.
I don’t have kids, but I am a kid at heart. And, believe kids just need to be kids!
I agree! Let them run around. they should be able to be wild and have fun while they can!
I LOVE this post. Thank you so much for sharing. My girl is 3 years old so this is a good reminder going forward that being a kid is so important. (love your pics too, how sweet)
thanks! And yes! Let them be little!
Yes! I parent the same way. Kids deserve to be kids! To explore, create and make messes!
yes! It’s so wonderful to know there are so many of us out there!
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